Please stay tuned to a full report, with photos, from the front lines of the Cross-Ocalypse. Rest assured, there was much in the way of Euro-Pro stylings, in addition to much t'aint snapping on the course. Big thanks to Rich Pierce, those ICCC'ers who came out to help, and of course the City of Valley Park who also did a ton of work for the event!
In the meantime, watch this video, and ask yourself "Just how much should we try to emulate the Europeans?" (Focus on the dude who pops in around min :38, and the subsequent assistant who hands him a waterbottle)
-C.F. Ryback
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15 comments:
Nico,
Great seeing you down at the Ritz last weekend. Remember Team Mack has their annual cyclo-cross coming up 2/15 (I believe) in Springfield, IL. It's on the STLBiking calendar, $1,000 purse. I know Master Segal himself will be there, but he believes your crew isn't "man" enough to show up, ok, kidding : ) Hope to see you guys there, I'll be there "racing" or something like that. WWW.stevendriscoll.blogspot.com
Steve & Gina Driscoll
Oh my God! That guy is so high on jenkem. I can see the end of the balloon sticking out of his pocket as he busts out his euro-flavored techno moves.
That dude looks like he is on day 4 of a meth binge and would love nothing more then to rip someone's lungs out and eat them for dinner
That dude is scary.
It does appear that he can read.
I like the chick with blue hair.
I love Europe!
Steven Seagal vs TechnoViking:
Seagal 78
TechnoViking 2
TechnoViking would get a couple of lucky shots in simply due to his ripped-atude, but ultimate he would be completely destroyed by Akido Master, Seagal. Read the book.
oh my goodness, why did I just watch all of that? why did someone record that?
Segal vs techno viking
Segal 31
techno viking 8 (but suffering a broken elbow)
Charles Bronson would then come in to clean up both Segal and techno viking in a Hard Times (watch it) street fight for money sort of way.
have fun with this link - http://www.aksalser.com/game.htm
This just in. I will be leaving Team Seagal to pursue Team Techno Viking asap! Sorry fellas but I got to do this......seriously though Coach I want my 4 mins back!
That just blew my mind. where do you find this shit coach.
I just realized I spelled Seagal wrong twice.
Was that a chick with the blue hair or was that Robort techno-dancing? Also, I think that dude used to be the front man for Gwar!
Robort loves techno dancing (while listening to GWAR oddly enough) although I would see him more as techno vikings domestic. (water hand-offs, ecstasy refills for his pez dispenser, that sort of thing)
I thought Robort was a cool dude until I caught him huffing a loaf of jenkem behind the high school gymnasium. His incessant techno dancing should have tipped me off. Or maybe the fact that he always had a plastic see-through lavender backpack full of Transformers and Go-Bots.
It all seems so obvious now.
Brian wait, that backpack sounds teh awesormz. How can that be a bad thing. I wish I had a plastic see-through lavender backpack full of Transformers and Go-Bots with me right now! I would set up a little war on the table in front of me. And of course the Transformers would win, because Go-Bots have teh weak sauce. Go-Bots are teh transformable robot toys version of K-mart brand basketball shoes, if they are all you can afford, great, but no one readily chooses them.
My Mega Mega Voltron would eat your transformer's weak sauce for breakfast , then he would eat some other sauce that wasn't weak just because he can.
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