20080226

Update to keep you amused

Greetings. I'll keep this brief. You need to understand and be able to identify certain people in life. This website can help:

www.hotchickswithdouchebags.com

IN OTHER NEWS...

Looks like the weather is actually starting to break this week... This Sunday there are two XC races, a Heartland Race at Landahl, and a NORBA race at St. Joes. Many Seagal Soldiers are attending each. In the event they are cancelled, we will be taking aim squarely on Council Bluff - who's in?

20080222

Truly, A Managerie of Energy Drinks

Greetings, loyal Team Seagal fans. You are in for a treat today. Almost as much of a treat as my taste buds were just in!

Because on days when the ice/sleet in my parking lot is of the consistency of Cream of Wheat, there are few other things to do since I can't ride my bike to work in a steaming bowl of Cream of Wheat. (That would be amazing to be able to ride in Cream of Wheat though, because that stuff is delicious - I would literally lick my bike clean.) So here are my ramblings about these 3 new challengers.

The packaging made big promises, which inevitably got my hopes way up:


But would I get a "super power," let alone a "new super power?" Would I indeed be "stamin-ized?" Time would surely tell!

Let's look at the challengers:


These two of these cans were identical to a couple of challengers from our last energy drink exhibition.
Asian energy drink manufacturers, in addition to making their cans bite-size, seem to believe that animals give you supreme energy. These are all very powerful, verile animals - the panther, the "super" lion, the prancing horse; and if you remember last time, the bull! They also really rely on this 1980's-luxury-car-interior brown when coloring their cans.

"But Casey Ryback," you may ask, "What about the damn taste?!?!" Hold your prancing horses. I'm getting to that. But first I have to ask you a question - have you ever had canned fruit salad? You know, the rubbery chunks in the heavy syrup? Well, the Panther drink tastes and drinks like heavy fruit salad syrup. That's bad. And Super Lion, despite it's name, is no more "super" than the Carabao and Red Bull from last time. In fact, it tastes EXACTLY the same as those two. These Asian maketing execs better be careful, American consumers are very saavy and may catch onto this ploy to get at our propensity to submit to various types of packaging. Worst case scenario, they may lose valuable market share in this cut-throat energy drink market.

There was a trickle of hope in this trio of tumultuous tastes. The third drink, "Red Ice," was, I have to admit, quite tasty. Tasty enough that I would actually consider purchasing it for purposes other than practical jokes! Sort of a cherry taste, and with carbonation. In case you were wondering, the name "Red Ice" wasn't just a catch, peppy-sounding name. It is coincidentally an acronym!

Most energy drinks try to downplay the role that caffeine plays in their ingredients. (As if any of those Chinese herbs and Kung Pao BS actually will wake you up...)

All I have to say is, "Welcome to Flavor Country."

Moral of the story? Read this blog, and enter in some races this summer so we can snap your wrists shortly after consumer a random no-name energy drink. We have just over a week till the St. Joe NORBA Race AND the Truman's Big Love Heartland Race! What a great way to kick the season off. Be there or be a puh-ssay.

20080220

Planning a mid-week vacation? Why not beautiful Lake Chubb!



Greetings and a pleasant good day to fellow Team Seagalers and non-Seagalers alike. Look at the current state of the magnificent stretch of dirt designated to memorialize the great, late Robert Walston Chubb. The normally placid Meremac River has become rather angered by the recent snow and rain - it has been shown that when swelled the Meremac will go wherever the hell it wants. Lt. Col Austin Travis and I discovered these sights yesterday afternoon at the end of the first big rock garden parallel to the now mighty river.





Trail conditions encountered until this point were generally very good, only slightly sloppy and moderately manure-ly when descending from the Lone Elk trailhead. Although we were unable to continue on towards the rocky ascents of West Tyson Park via the normal channels, we did find our way around the newly formed Lake Chubb to complete our lap (we tried to hire the Destroyer's boat, but instead decided to think "tracks"). The Lt. and I are happy to report that the West Tyson portion is currently completely rideable, and as always very highly recommended.

The River bottoms portion of Chubb as Lone Elk park segues into West Tyson is under 5 feet of water, look at the sign pointing adventurers’ on towards West Tyson, it is almost completely submerged!



Let us all pray to the Lord of Chubb that the flood waters will soon recede, and that the trail is soon restored to its former glory. Until then, who's down to ride The Berryman? I haven’t been yet.
Thanks for stopping by,

-Nico Toscani

20080212

I wish I could build frames like this brutha here in St. Louis...

Bet you didn't think anyone in this town could make a respectable frame. If so, you were quite wrong. Check it, SUCKA!

http://www.felletbrazing.blogspot.com



Talk about snapped wrists! In fact, that should be the slogan - "Snapped wrists, not snapped frames!"

Not available for purchase.

Yet.

20080206

Its 70 degrees out - ride to Hog Hollow Rd or to the Chain of Rocks Bridge?

If you have a superior attitude you can do both. Monday the fourth of February started off very soggy and kind of chilly. Somehow the temperature began to rise and the promised overcastness pushed off to the northwest leaving sunny skies and relatively dry roadways. Lt. Col Austin Travis stopped by my apartment atop his Schwinn World Sport, sporting 27" wheels and a top tube that is not quite long enough to be comfortable. Lt. Col ordered me to throw on the chamois, we were going for a ride.



The night before was the Super Bowl - the game was OK, but nothing compared to the food consumed during it. Mason Storm and his captivating fiancée, Ms. Katemeyer, hosted an organized culinary competition at their home in South City. The guests of honor for this cook-off were 4 fantastically diverse pots of chili, and 1 pot of seafood gumbo. Diagnosis, delicious. The Shop Minister offered up some quick directions on how to do the Hog's Hollow Rd ride which I wrote down on post-it notes and stuck into my wallet.

Lt. Col and I left Dogtown around 12 noon under the direction of the post-it notes. Heading westward, we took Clayton Rd to Conway Rd to White Rd to Fairtrails Rd, and so on...about 20 miles had past when we stopped at the Phillips 66 station at Olive Blvd and Hog Hollow Rd for Red Bull and to take a leak. Austin almost forgot he was carrying the restroom key when we getting ready to depart, the store clerks should probably find something bulky to attach it to.




Descending Hog Hollow Rd is very fast and quite fun, cross the railroad tracks at the bottom and you've entered the Creve Coeur "flats," approx 6 miles of very smooth, velocious, and wide black top leading you into Creve Coeur Park.




We pressed on from Creve Coeur Park, traveling east towards downtown. Twenty-five or so miles later it was time for lunch, Lt. Col and I really needed to consume some calories. Double Cheeseburgers have just about as many calories as anything does so we ordered up a couple of them from the Hardees at 6th and Chestnut. This is the view east from the patio at the brand new Hardee's.



After lunch we traveled north on The Riverfront Trail in hopes of crossing the Chain of Rocks Bridge before dusk set-in. Unfortunately, we were a little late in the day and the gate to the bridge was locked, Illinois was closed.







We turned around from the bridge and rode back to Forest Park. It was past 6:00pm by now, we were at mile 75 and cycling under the cover of night. On accident Lt. Col and I overshot the only restroom facility open in Forest Park, located adjacent to the ball fields just west of the mounted police stables. We had planned to stop there for more water - after passing it we decided to just make a loop in the park and stop there on the flip-side. The loop was speedy and full of adventure so we stayed in Forest Park and repeated it four more times... finally the odometer read 100. It was almost 8:00pm, Lt. Col and I stopped by Mobil at Hampton and 40 for 24oz Busch cans and Snickers bars, a true reward for true champions equipped only with single speed road bikes, a superior attitude and a superior state of mind.

-Nico Toscani

20080201

Morning Wood

So I set the alarm nice an early to wake up today to get out and ride the snow at Castlewood before going into work at 10am. Woke up to the sound of Ice, Ice Baby on the clock radio. Did somebody call that in for me remind me why I was waking up so damn early. The alarm went off right before the beginning of the song. I can honestly say I remember way too many of the lyrics. After some bike technical issues and a slow drive out there I got to the gate right as Rich Love was getting ready to open it after plowing the front of the park. Not another soul there at first. Saw two jeeps drive in and then drive out while I was there. Rode up the Love trail, with some walking when the front end washed, and a nice steady descent down the grotpeter (pedaling) and then on into the river flats. 1 hour. Awesome. 2 snowstorms this winter and two snow rides. Double awesome.
This was probably the final ride for the old ebay find frame for a while. It served its purpose for a week or two. The new Lynskey has arrived.

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